Friday, April 24, 2015

Ruminations


“RUMINATIONS” 
by Rick Jones, husband of The Minister's Wife 

When I agreed to write a regular column of [hopefully] humorous and insightful commentaries on life for my wife's blog, Lois and I had some details to hammer out. “Hammer” is figurative, of course. Our family discussions involve other weaponry. I rely on wit, sarcasm and technicalities of the English language; she relies on an old family heirloom, her grandmother's iron skillet.

Oh, you didn't think she resorts to violence, did you? I meant that she bribes me with the promise of a four-egg omelet if I'll concede the point under discussion.

We quickly determined things like length and frequency of articles; I told her I don't really care about graphics and pictures, so any of that you might see is her contribution to this effort. Of course, since I'm just playing a supporting role in her production here, she has broad editorial discretion. It's safer that way: sometimes I write things that I find hilarious, but which make no sense to, or will be highly offensive to, my audience.

During sermon preparation, I would often share my notes with Lois, getting helpful reactions like “No one will get that joke” [she was right] or “Didn't you quote lyrics from Alice Cooper last week?”

There were a few times while preaching that I would suddenly think of a great pun to drive home a point. Instinctively, I would glance at Lois. She knew that look: I was wishing I could bounce the idea off her. Then I'd get distracted because I could see her reaction: It was as if she “sensed a strange stirring in the Force.” She'd turn pale and her eyes grew wide, like she was about to witness a train wreck but couldn't look away. Then she'd try to locate the nearest exit.

And after reading this article, and reminiscing about those last-moment jokes, you can believe that Lois will diligently exercise her editorial privileges. And maybe enforce them with an antique iron skillet.

Tune in next time, when I explain why “Rick's Ramblings” and “Ruminations” were rejected. Unless I get distracted.

22 comments:

  1. It is good to hear from you again. I am excited to read your posts. I know that writing sermons is probably so much different than writing a blog post. Thank you for sharing your thoughts.

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    1. He said it is different in some ways, mainly cause here he can let more of his humor out. Not so easy in a sermon.

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  2. You seem pretty funny to me and I use a skillet to keep my hubs in line too

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    1. I really don't use a skillet to keep him in line, but I will tease him about not making omelets if he doesn't behave! LOL!

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  3. LOL, I Have threatened my husband with a beating from an old frying pan before :)

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    1. I've never really threatened him with the frying pan, although we joke about it. I do tease about not cooking for him though. He doesn't like that!

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  4. Can't wait to read more! I love your sense of humor!

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  5. Glad you realized that you got to ramble to get fed. I love her bribery.

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  6. Food is always the way to a husband's tummy. I think my husband married me because he knew I'd make him a hot breakfast every day. ;)

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    1. I had to cook for Rick before we got married as a test. Cracks me up now!!

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  7. my husband is always asking if something is funny when writing a speech, it rarely ever is funny.

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  8. I just love it. Such a great post filled with full of sense of humor. Thanks for sharing your fun-full thoughts!

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    1. Thanks! He's planning on sharing quite a bit.

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  9. You guys sound like such a cute couple and I think an omelet is great way to bribe. I can't wait to read more.

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    1. Thanks! He's been trying to figure out how long it has been since I made him an omelet.

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  10. Nothing beats when you support your wife all the way.

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    1. I agree! He's earned a boat load of brownie points!

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  11. Excited to return for another week of ruminations. Always humorous, always inspiring and uplifting.

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    1. He has a knack of making people snicker!

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